I stumbled upon this Post on RyanHoliday.net and it describes my feelings to the letter.
I keep saying this but it is not easy. Most mornings you wake up and nothing happened. You get The Fear. You hold onto your principles, your faith in yourself contrary to all posted evidence. Sometimes you break down and have turn to some to someone and completely open up: “What the fuck am I supposed to do?” You see people and wonder what obliviousness feels like and maybe wish for it a little. The stress of knowing there is always something left undone, that you’re letting people down, that you got in over your head. The little twinge of accomplishment you feel at people’s jealousy–and the counterbalance of its loneliness. And of course, the Damoclean notion of knowing that others were here too and failed and got fucked. You worry about stuff that a 25 year old isn’t supposed to worry about. Like getting cornered, selling out, or being over exposed. Making sure you don’t spin off the planet.
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